Long Covid Stories: For Those Who Think Covid-19 is Just Another Flu

Amanda, a 46-year-old who was generally healthy prior to contracting Covid-19 last year, now gets lost driving to places she goes to every week.  And her lungs are so congested that she feels like she’s drowning until she coughs up handfuls of foamy liquid.  Her vision and hearing have been impaired and she has been diagnosed with post-viral POTS (Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome).  She has a masters In English and is a published writer.  But now she can no longer hold a job.

It seems that, at this point, most of us have in some way been touched by the Covid-19 virus.  And we are all familiar with the numbers - over 41 million confirmed cases and close to 700,000 deaths in the United States alone.  But hidden in those figures is another statistic - one that has baffled the medical community and has left many of us struggling to find answers.  

I’m referring, of course, to  “long-haulers” - those of us for whom the effects of Covid-19 simply will not let up. 

Most people - except perhaps those who live with us - can’t believe we’re still sick after months, a year, or even longer.  For me, it’s been 17 months.  

I can’t deny that some of us do have good days (or if we’re really lucky, a good week or two). On those days, we feel like it’s finally over.  And we start trying to live normal lives again.  But we’re inevitably knocked flat by what we call a “flare” if we catch a simple cold, are somehow physically injured (for me it can be something as innocuous as a bug bite), are exposed to stress, are out in the heat too long, or simply “overdo it”.   

What exactly, you might ask, is a “flare”?  The worst ones for me go something like this - with no warning, I get up to walk and my legs fold under me, after which the intense trembling begins - trembling so bad that I’ve broken teeth and bruised myself.  These “episodes” are always accompanied by a very rapid heartbeat and the inability to think or speak coherently.  The worst one I had lasted 35 minutes.  Then the week or so afterward is spent recovering from it, during which I feel exhausted and beat-up.

Even on good days I struggle with varying degrees of brain fog,  short-term memory loss, various aches and pains, tachycardia, and  insomnia - insomnia so bad that no sleeping aids help at all.  

It is believed that 10 to 30% of those who had even mild symptomatic Covid are now long-haulers.  With 41 million Americans having contracted the virus since its inception, there may be as many as several million of us in our country alone.  

For the record, Covid-19 is not just a flu.  It is much more insidious.  And for many of us, it does not go away. I’ve reached out to others whose lives have been upended by this virus.  And they have given me permission to share their stories.  These are people who not only want answers, but they desperately need to be heard and understood.  Most of all, they are people who want others to never have to suffer as they have. 

Tanya is a published PHD who has suffered significant cognitive, short-term memory and vocabulary loss.  She can’t organize her thoughts, remember or determine sequences, make decisions, or keep a train of thought going.  She also - like most, if not all of us, suffers from chronic fatigue.  

Both Amanda and Tanya have been offered consulting or writing work but they do not have the confidence that their brains will cooperate enough to commit to it.  I share this problem as well,  so please bear with my obvious short-comings as I attempt to tell the rest of our stories. 

Jennie is going on 10 months as a long-hauler.  She got Covid in early December at the High School school where she used to teach.  She says that she adored her job and tried to return to the classroom on three separate occasions only to literally collapse all three times.  So she was forced to resign.  She attended her son’s college graduation in a wheelchair.     “I’m just not the me I used to be”, she says, “And I want her back!”

Lauren had both the (original) Alpha strain last summer, for which she was hospitalized, and the Delta variant this summer.  She contracted the virus from an outdoor dining patio because she had limited exposure to others and always wore a mask indoors.  Like all of us, she is exhausted and yearns to live her life again.  

Brandon is 38 years old and was unable to write out his story.  Instead I had the privilege of talking to him over the phone.  Before contracting Covid in March of 2020, he was an amature boxer, an avid drag racer, and was working toward a PHD in Kinesiology and Physical Therapy.  He was a massage/physical therapist with a clientele of around 200 people.  His initial symptoms were rather mild - a cough, shortness of breath, and muscular pain.  But around day 10, his world turned upside down.  He began struggling with back and neck pain, brain fog, fatigue, tremors in his hand, and headaches so bad that he was vomiting and went to the hospital 3 times, hoping to get some relief.  He was essentially our guinea pig, undergoing just about every medical test short of a spinal tap to get to the bottom of his often debilitating symptoms which also included severe constipation and - for the first few months - tachycardia.  It was discovered that he had, among other things, a vascular injury to his brain and was diagnosed with Macrophage Activation Syndrome, which is indicative of Lymphoma.  He was also diagnosed with POTS, although I was thrilled to discover that, after a few months, those symptoms (very rapid heart rate upon standing) have stopped.  Brandon also believes many of us are suffering from Gastroparesis, which is characterized by damage to the Vagus Nerve, which helps manage the complex process in our digestive tracts.  Brandon’s “good days” last for only 2 to 3 days at a time before he is hit with a flare that escalates as the day goes by.  Asked if he felt supported by and understood by his friends and family, he responded with an emphatic, “Not at all!”, with the exception of his fiancee, whom he plans to wed next May.  Since contracting Covid, Brandon has been unable to work or to complete his PHD program.  

Judy is 9 months into her long haul.  She came down with Covid on Thanksgiving and was already wheezing with her heart racing at 135 beats a minute when she went to the hospital ER later that night.  She was put on Singulair, antibiotics, and was given an inhaler.    A week later she was in a wheelchair, unable to walk.  She was admitted to the hospital and started 5 days of Redemesvir infusions. While in the hospital, her oxygen dropped to 70%.  (Note that a person is uncomfortable and considered in distress if oxygen saturation drops below 94%,  Mine has dropped into the 80’s and, when that happens,  I feel like I’m drowning).   After a week, she was allowed to go home.  She struggles now with severe tachycardia, headaches, body and joint pain, memory loss, fatigue, stomach pain, difficulty reading,  and the inability to concentrate.  Needless to say, she also lost her job of over 30 years as an MRI and CT tech.  Before Covid, she could work 12-hour shifts and then come home to do 45 minutes to an hour of cardio.  

Christy is 39 years old and admits that her actual Covid, which she contracted in April  2020,  was not bad.  A few days of fatigue, mild fever, coughing, and chills.  But the long haul portion of her illness has been debilitating.  Her brain fog is awful - she can’t remember words she learned in elementary school.  She also suffers from bouts of fatigue, heart palpitations, depression, anxiety, and “super itchy skin”.  Just recently, she has begun to feel dizzy and queasy.   She adds that she got Covid before masks were made available to the general public.  (I think many of us can relate to that!  Many long-haulers also came down with the virus before general testing was available)

Cheryl is 66 years old and had type 2 diabetes, high blood pressure, and asthma as pre-existing conditions.  When she contracted Covid, her fevers were so high that they considered putting her in an ice bath.   She was also hallucinating and was given Redemisvir.  Now, months later, she suffers from severe headaches and her breathing is so poor that she can’t say more than a few words without gasping.  She also has an unrelenting sore throat and dry cough.  And every so often, her glands swell up.  As you may guess, she is having difficulty keeping her sugar under control, as well. 

Susan is a licensed Optician who has been suffering since July of 2020.  And like so many others suffering from long Covid, she is no longer able to work.  She’s been in the ER 12 times, including an episode where she was diagnosed with a TIA, during which she could not remember words.  Her long haul symptoms started with tremors, weakness, blurred vision, rashes, bruising, and Covid toes.  She now suffers from heart irregularities, liver enzyme problems, blood pressure issues, breathing difficulties, anxiety, and insomnia.  But the worst symptoms are continuing cognitive issues.  She recalled the day she poured her dog’s food into a vase instead of his bowl.  And she once stopped at a light while driving and forgot why she was in her car.  Sadly, her list went on and on.  

I have to agree with her.  These types of symptoms are the worst.  You feel like you’re losing your mind.  More than once I have walked to our neighborhood market only to forget why I went once I got there.  A panic rises up inside you when this happens and you feel like crying as your face flushes with embarrassment.  An embarrassment that you and only you are aware of as the world, it seems, closes in around you.   I think that’s the worst part of what we call brain fog - the feeling of your mind being squashed into blackness as sounds drift away and words slip from your mind.  

 

Lisa Marie has been sick for 17 ½ months.  Yes, you find yourself counting the days.  She caught Covid as a front line RN.  Her worst symptoms now are fatigue and her “poor, struggling lungs”.  She often feels like she’s drowning, even with her nightly CPAP.  She says it’s a horrific feeling.  She’s lonely.  She misses nursing, and has no life, no adventures, no real fun.  It’s an endless horizon of sickness and sadness.  

Evan is also at about 17 ½ months.  He’s not sure where he contracted Covid but he works in healthcare and lives in New York, which was the epicenter of the pandemic at the time.  He had a mild case but did lose his sense of taste and smell.  His worst symptoms now are occasional tachycardia, pain in his abdomen, and ongoing neuropathy in his feet that vacillates between tingling, numbness, and pain.  Also, anytime he stretches his arms or legs the wrong way they feel broken for about 30 seconds.   After almost a year and a half, he notes that he has still not regained his sense of taste.  

Angela has been struggling post-Covid for 18 months.  She suffers from “horrendous” headaches accompanied by severe eye pain.  For months her headaches were accompanied by all over chills.  She also suffers intense pain in her legs, arms, and shoulder blades behind her lungs.  It has felt like fire at times.  It was hard for her to walk or to stand.  And she, like Evan, lost her sense of taste and smell for several months.  The lasting impact from Covid, she says, has damaged her, especially her nerves and her veins.  And like many of us, she wonders if this damage is permanent. 

Azra was first infected at the end of 2020.  She developed a pulmonary embolism and was on oxygen.  As weeks passed, her health deteriorated. She lost all muscle mass, experienced debilitating arm and leg pain, experienced hair loss, blurry vision, floaters, and brain fog.  She used to run but now a 500 meter walk is too much for her.  6 months after contracting Covid, she was re-infected with the Delta virus.  That time it was more of a nasal infection, but after 2 weeks, she needed sinus surgery.  She had to discontinue her blood thinners when she had the surgery and now her blood is clotting again.  9 months later, it feels like it will never end.  She says that even though she survived Covid, it has taken her life from her.    

Karla is 39 years old and is a nurse.  She tested positive on November 13, 2020.  It was rough, she said, but not terrible.  So she returned to work.  Then in April, her body suddenly felt broken.  She was short of breath, suffered headaches and experienced hard chills.  She tested positive (again) on April 6th.  After recuperating at home, she again returned to work only to begin experiencing intense pain in her leg.  She discovered she had deep vein thrombosis.  She was put on blood thinners and started seeing an internist and a hematologist.  In the middle of May, she began to experience joint pain, headaches, and chills.  She tested positive for Covid on May 22nd.  And again on July 22nd.   Since then her blood pressure has gone as high as 187/127.   Tests revealed no damage and she was sent home.  Recurring symptoms include blurred and double vision, and weakness in her extremities.  Needless to say, she has not returned to work…

Sudden attacks of high blood pressure are something I have also struggled with in the long haul, with it once reaching 198/120.  The next day it had dropped to my new “normal” of 102/62.  What we experience can sometimes feel life-threatening, yet all too often tests reveal no serious issues and, once the “episode” is over, things slowly return to a semblance of normal again.  It can be crazy-making!

Kathie contracted Covid in March of 2020.  She’s 65 and doesn’t think her lungs will ever be normal again.  She had pneumonia 3 times last year and feels “ a deep level of congestion returning.”  She says that the medical care she has received has been ineffectual at best,  but she doesn’t know where else to turn.

I think many of us feel this way.  But we really can’t blame our doctors.  They’re doing the best they can with a huge unknown.  The variety and intensity of symptoms we exhibit have stymied them.  Many of us have been diagnosed with POTS, but even that seems to miss the mark.  Yes, we all suffer from tachycardia, lightheadedness, and fatigue.  But when you throw in the other symptoms we’ve dealt with including such things as hair loss, heat rashes, Covid toes, and digestive and sleep disturbances, it isn’t so easy to fit us neatly into that or any other category. 

Becca says that she’s been telling her doctors for months that she is dying in front of them.   And no one can tell her why.  Multiple organs have been affected, including her brain and her heart.  She is glad her doctors listen to her in spite of all the frustrations of being a long hauler and hopes that she and they can apply what they’re learning together and share what they learn in the process. 

Shelley said her initial virus was very mild, so much so that she questioned her diagnosis.  Since then she has developed symptoms consistent with what the rest of us post-covid long haulers have been through and she is unable to work.  After 3 months, her Epstein Barr and Cytomegalovirus had been activated and she developed pneumonia which was what really “took her down”.   

Charlie is a 27 year-old who used to run 5 kilometers three times a week.  Now he suffers from chest pains, excruciating migraines, severe breathlessness, dizziness and exhaustion.  He says that if he had known he’d be this sick back in March when he contracted the virus, he would have taken everything a lot more seriously.  “But all you heard back then”, he said,” was that if you were young, you’d be ill for a couple of weeks and that would be it.”   

Record numbers of young people have now been stricken with Covid-19.  And a surprising number of them are long-haulers.   On one of the Facebook support sites I belong to (a site with almost 14,000 members who are all struggling with long Covid), a 15-year old is in intensive care with complications resulting from the virus. 

Jennifer had acute symptoms in  March of 2020.  She woke up with a hangover-like headache and a fever of 103 that lasted 10 days.  By May, she was experiencing constant chest pain and shortness of breath.  Tests showed that she had 90% blockage of an artery that resulted in her needing a stent and 6 new medications. Now her memory comes and goes, her vision has deteriorated and depression can be debilitating.  Once upon a time, she says, she was a writer.  

Most of us have our “once upon a time” stories.  Once upon a time some of us were teachers, some were nurses, and some were lab technicians. Some worked out every day or ran marathons.  Some of us volunteered our time helping others in our community.  Now we spend our time trying to regain a semblance of what we were before.

  

Pokemon Go - More Than Just A Game!

When my boys were little - very little, like 5 and 7 years old - everyone was collecting Pokemon Cards and playing the card game that would launch dozens of Nintendo (handheld) games and eventually give rise to what has become a virtual gaming craze - Pokemon Go.  And I am not ashamed to admit that I have been following and enjoying each and every evolution.  

When my son came to visit us in early July, he introduced me to Pokemon Go and I have to admit that, initially, it frightened me.  I didn't like the idea of a game that you played "out in the world".  It felt - well - outside of my comfort zone.  But I followed him around as he picked up poke balls, potions, and raspberries; and caught little critters like Dratini, Oddish, Psyduck, Eevee, and Magikarp and evolved them into their advanced forms - all while walking around and, even better, talking with other Pokemon Go players!  For three fun-filled days, he dazzled me with this new and exciting game.  Besides getting several kilometers of walking in each day, we chatted with other people about what level they were, and where to catch the rarest Pokemon, etc.  At least once each day, we actually sat next to other players and shared information about each other's lives.  It was great and, yes, I quickly became hooked.  

Within a week, I had loaded up a game of my own and began collecting, walking, and meeting other friendly players.  I joined Team Valor (the red team) as my son had, and eventually braved the Gyms, where one can battle other Pokemon and claim sites for their team.  Above is a picture of a Gym - just as I was capturing it.  It was the first one I got and it was very satisfying.  There were 3 Pokemon on it (Team Blue) and I beat each of them, one at a time.  It took 5 of my Pokemon to do so, but once I captured the Gym and claimed it for our team, I placed Tweedle Dum, "one" of my Gyrados on top.  (See below).  

The game is easy to play, although battles can be confusing.  I found I needed some online help before attempting one.  The big thing to keep in mind is that, once the Battle is over and you have won, you need to choose and place a Pokemon on the Gym.  The game does not automatically do that for you.  The actual battle is pretty easy - just keep repeatedly tapping the screen until someone's Pokemon faints.  As I said, it took 5 of mine to "take" the Gym I conquered, but it was worth it.

Pokemon Go is the game you see people playing on their cell phones.  They usually travel in pairs.  And when they find a Pokemon they want, you will see them stop and make a very distinctive upward motion with their index finger on the phone's "screen".  When they catch it, they move on.  If you see someone moving their finger back and forth in a sideways motion, it means they have found a Pokestop and are collecting balls and raspberries (to help them catch Pokemon) and potions and revives (to heal them after a battle).

There are two things I love about this game: 1.) it gets people out of their houses and moving!  Unlike other "video" games, this one requires the player to exercise - sometimes a lot!  And 2.) it is a social game.  As you play - especially in popular locations such as tourist sites - you will find yourself chatting with other players as you walk along catching and fighting Pokemon.  There is a spot in D.C. where there are literally hundreds of people playing every Saturday and Sunday.  It is near a memorial that has fountains, rest rooms,  and a gift shop and, best of all, is near the water.  So the "walking" you do there is both refreshing and filled with things to do and see along the way.  

Pokemon Go is more than a game - it is, like the Wii before it, a way to get exercise.  But unlike the Wii, which can only be played in one spot (usually indoors), this game gets you moving, meeting, and greeting.  Good-bye to sedentary gaming!  Hello world!  

Heimlich, anyone?

Years ago, I was able to use what I had learned in a CPR course when I performed mouth-to-mouth resuscitation on someone until an ambulance arrived and took him to the hospital.  I was told by the EMT's that I saved his life.  It's one of the good things I've done with my life.

Yesterday, I was enjoying a delicious meal of Beet and Goat Cheese Salad with a nice crusty bread on the side when I accidentally inhaled a piece of the bread instead of chewing it as I was supposed to.  I was doing something no one should do:  I was talking while I popped the little morsel into my mouth.  Almost instantly, I knew I was in trouble.  I tried to breathe and could not catch a breath.  My airway was completely blocked.  I tried to cough and couldn't.  All I could do was make this godawful sound while the person sitting across from me exclaimed, "You're choking?  I wish I knew the Heimlich Maneuver!".  She said I was turning a very deep shade of crimson.  The waitress came by as I continued to gasp and here's where things get fuzzy.  I felt myself getting incredibly dizzy and the next thing I knew the bread had been dislodged.  I had been trying desperately to get some tea down to move the bread and I guess it worked.  So I didn't die, although it certainly felt like I was going to be meeting my maker the way Mama Cass Elliott reportedly did.   I guess the thing that freaked me out is that I could have died!  I was choking, I was turning purple and I was dizzy.  I think the next step would have been unconsciousness.  Afterward, my throat felt raw and tender and I kept sipping tea to try to soothe it.  It honestly had been one of those experiences where I saw my life flash before my eyes.

So I have made it my goal to make sure that no one else is in the position my friend was in  - at least no one who reads this Blog, which means we gabby eaters are in big trouble!   No one should see a person choking and just sit there and exclaim that they "wish" they could help!  Not when Dr. Henry Heimlich came up with a simple technique to dislodge foreign items (such as bread crusts) from one's airway.  Described as abdominal thrusts, here's how to perform this potentially life-saving technique:

1.)  Pull the victim (of choking) to his or her feet and stand behind him/her with your feet about shoulder width apart to keep yourself steady
2.)  Reach around and circle your hands around the person's abdomen
3.)  Make a fist with your dominant hand (meaning if you are right-handed, you use your right hand) with the thumb facing toward (and into) the person's stomach
4.)  Place this "fist" above the person's belly button and under their breastbone, wrapping your other hand around the fist.
5.)  Pull inward and upward with quick thrusts, making a motion similar to the letter "J" - in, then up.  Repeat until the object is expelled.  (Note: if the person loses consciousness, stop the Maneuver and call 911).

Now, please understand.  I am not by any means being critical of my friend or of anyone who may have witnessed what was happening, hoping I would dislodge the item on my own.  If you don't know how to do the Heimlich Maneuver, you can do more harm than good to the person.  And back slapping really does nothing to move an object out of one's airway once it has found its way in there.  I would have sadly tried that and - well - prayed!  Often when an object like a crusty piece of bread is inhaled instead of swallowed, it does "work its way out" eventually, as mine apparently did.  (I am pretty sure the tea helped!).  But if we can help, by all means, we should.  You never know.  You may actually save a life.

FYI, the Mama's & The Papa's "I Saw Her Again" just started playing on my Pandora station.  Coincidence?  I think not!  O.K.  So Mama Cass didn't really die by choking on a ham sandwich as rumors suggested, but it makes a good story, doesn't it?  

Be safe, eat healthy, exercise, and - please - be ready, willing and able to help someone if the situation arises where you could potentially save a life.   

Shower Yoga

SHOWER YOGA

Yup, you read that right: "Shower Yoga".  It's how I begin my days.  And it not only gets all of my stiff joints and muscles moving after a night of sleep, but it is exhilarating as well.  Here's how it goes:  First I take a nice, very warm shower and then turn the nozzle down so it no longer hits me.  I slide over to the other side of the shower and begin my stretches.  I reach my hands high over my head, interlocking them, and bend back as far as I can.  I actually bend back until I hear (and feel) my back crack.  It is a wonderful feeling - the best!  Then I put my feet about shoulder width apart and reach my hands over my head again (interlocking them) and bend from the waist - first to the right and then to the left, holding each stretch for 10 seconds  Then I reach my arms out to the sides as far as they can go and hold that pose for 10 seconds, after which I pull them into the center with my hands, forearms and elbows fused together.  I hold that for 10 seconds as well.  I then repeat the entire sequence, holding each pose for 7 seconds.  I Then reach my hands up high and bend over, touching my toes or grabbing my ankles.  I do that 4 times and hold it 5 seconds each time.  Finally, I do my "Tree".  I begin with my left leg, placing it high on my thigh as I balance on my right foot and hold it for 60 seconds.  I repeat on the left side and then I'm done!  (Note:  the shower is running the entire time, which makes the experience especially refreshing and, well, that's the exhilarating part!).  And I usually pray when I hold the Tree pose, so that part may take longer than 2 minutes).  

I encourage you to try this.  You can vary your stretches, especially if you are a Yoga aficionado.  Just make sure that you engage all of your muscles and that you DO NOT SLIP OR FALL.  It is a wonderful way to start your day.  I have to confess that I suffer from pretty bad arthritis, especially in my lower back and hips.  And since I've been doing Shower Yoga, I have experienced much relief.  I'm not saying its a cure-all, but it's worked for me!  

Empty Nest Diet, including Apricot Crepes

No, we aren't eating orchids now that both of our boys have flown the coop.  But we are traveling - a lot - which makes eating healthy challenging.  The above picture?  It's from an Orchid Show in State College, PA.  And it was incredible!  But what we ate that weekend was not so incredible.  We were with our oldest son and went to a pub and a Mexican restaurant where craft beers were the appetizers and the main courses were, well, less than healthy.  And I have to confess that, after a few months of pub and restaurant dining, I paid for it.  I developed what seemed to be acid reflux and could only sleep propped up - pretty high.  So I reexamined my diet and made some changes.

First, I am cooking more.  I mean, I really enjoy it, so why not?  I am making Indian dishes, quiches, vegetarian pastas, and other non-meat fare.  I have cut out beer and any other liquor except for an occasional glass of red wine, which I only drink with a meal.  I make my own bread now - no exceptions.  I was alarmed when a loaf of whole grain bread I bought from our local market had not spoiled at all - after almost 2 months!  That is just not normal.  And I include an occasional dessert on the menu.  My favorite right now is Apricot Crepes.  Here's the recipe:

I make a basic low-fat crepe batter in the morning (using 1 percent organic milk and lite butter instead of their full-fat counterparts) and refrigerate it until after dinner.  Then I make a sauce out of 1 T. lite butter, 1 T. flour, 1 and 1/2 T. raw sugar, the juice of a small can of apricots and stir until thickened and bubbly.  I quarter the apricots and add them to the sauce with 1/2 T. lemon juice and 2 T. chopped pecans.  I make 2 large crepes and fill them with a little more than half of the sauce, roll them up and pour the rest over them.  I sprinkle them with a little powdered sugar, add a dollop of fat free whipped cream and serve. They are heavenly!  Plus, you will find that even making half of most basic crepe recipes, you will have enough crepe batter to either make about 6 to 8 of these or to have them 3 or 4 times if your nest is empty like ours.  The batter refrigerates well for a couple of days.

When I eat out, I am once more scouring the menus for healthy choices - grilled fish instead of "fish and chips" (which I had grown to love at the pubs we frequented), pasta Primavera, veggie burgers, and blackened fish tacos.  I no longer order french fries or any other fried foods.  And guess what?  Big surprise!  I am feeling better.  No more reflux, no more sleeping sitting up.  What a difference a change in diet made.

O.K.  So the nest is empty and we travel about as much as we are home.  But that is no excuse for developing poor eating habits.  There are so many healthy choices out there:  quinoa salads, sweet potatoes, and vegetarian options?  They are on virtually every menu these days.  Yes, my husband and I still travel - a lot.  But now my challenge - something I really look forward to - is finding restaurants with healthy menu options and keeping it all delicious.  So here are some restaurants I highly recommend:
If you are in Philadelphia, Pesto Italian Restaurant; in Annapolis, Maryland, Vin 909; in San Pedro, California, Think Cafe; in La Jolla, California, anything downtown on the water.  And the best veggie burger? The Burger Joint (and they're a chain).  Most Indian restaurants have delicious vegetarian options, as do Thai and Japanese ones.  If you are a Pescatarian like me, seafood places often have delicious options with great sides.

It has been ages since I have posted here.  But now that I plan to cook more often, I will post my favorite recipes here, as well as any restaurants that really stand out.

Until next time, happy and healthy eating!

Being a Pescetarian

I am a pescetarian.  I just discovered that a few days ago.  What exactly, you may ask, does that mean? That I am an avid fan of Joe Pesci?  As a matter of fact, I am.  But pescetarianism has nothing to do with being a fan of a talented Italian actor.  It is vegetarianism with a twist.  As a vegetarian, I do not eat meat. No beef, pork, lamb, turkey, or chicken.  No exceptions.  I do eat dairy - am a cheese-aholic to tell the truth.  I also eat eggs, with my favorites being over medium with a nice whole grain toast.  But when I go out to a nice restaurant, I will, on occasion, order fish, making me what I thought was an "ovo-lacto-pesco vegetarian.  It turns out, however, that there is no such thing.  Fish is, technically, a meat.  So how do I justify eating it?

For one thing, I do not abstain from meat purely for humanitarian reasons.  I have nothing against organic meat.  I honestly believe that man is an omnivore by nature.  But the way we, as a rule, raise and slaughter our meat, is reprehensible.  It shows a lack of respect for God and His creation. Moreover, with the addition of often copious amounts of steroids and antibiotics, I don't think it is good for anyone.   This is why I should be giving up all but organic meat, at least.  But even this is not the reason why I no longer eat meat.  My honest problem with meat is kind of embarrassing.  Apparently I have the digestive system of a newborn baby.  I cannot comfortably digest meat.  I used to live with almost constant liver or stomach pain.  Since giving meat up, though, I feel so much better - plain and simple.  I added back the dairy, eggs, and fish after a brief go at being a pure vegetarian and found that they do not bother me at all.  Nor do they bother my conscience.  Fish have been caught in large nets since the beginning of time.  I stay away from farm-raised fish because (coincidentally?), farm-raised fish - particularly salmon - bothers my digestive system much like meat does.

So, since I last regularly posted, when I cook, it is vegetarian - ovo-lacto-vegetarian.  I bring no meat or fish into my house.  And I love that.  It somehow feels "clean".   I have a bevy of recipes that my husband and I enjoy and will share them with you in future posts.  I make dishes like Eggplant Parmesan, Tomato-Basil Quiche, Mushroom Crepes, and Vegetarian Curry.  I still try to cut the fat down in these rather rich meals and will share with you how I do that, as well.

When I order fish in restaurants, I usually look for a nice seared tuna or something like trout with a mango salsa.  Every once in a while, I will try a lightly breaded catfish, flounder, or cod.  And my naughty indulgence?  Calamari - prepared just about any way you can think of.

So, this is the new me - eating a diet that makes me feel - well - pretty wonderful on most days! 

O'Noir Restaurant, Montreal - Eating in the Dark

It has been so-o long since I have posted here.  There have been many changes in my life.  I don't know where to begin.  So I will break the ice with a review of an exciting and unique dining experience I had a week ago.  It was one of the highlights of a recent vacation that was filled with new adventures! 

When you enter O'Noir restaurant in Montreal, Canada,  you do not realize that you are about to embark on an exercise of trust. You are told to remove anything that lights up or glows, including watches or cell phones, and to place them in a locker. And even though you made the reservations knowing you'd be eating in the dark (thus the name of the restaurant), you don't quite understand what that means.  

You order your meal before entering the dining area, which you do "a la Bunny Hop" by holding onto the shoulders of your waiter who, God knows how, guides you to your table and helps you sit in your chair.  Your spouse is holding onto your shoulders as you amble blindly along. Once seated, you realize that never in your life has there been a room as dark as the one you are in. You can see absolutely nothing.  It is pitch black. 

As you realize your eyes will never "adjust" to the darkness, you feel a hand on your shoulder and hear the familiar voice of your waiter (in our case Samuel) telling you that he has placed your water glass on your left shoulder.  He then instructs you to grab it and feel around the table in front of you for a spot in front of your placemat where you gently place it. Then comes the stemmed wine glass full of wine.  I place mine beside my water glass and I do not let go of it. A basket of warm rolls is then held beside me and I am instructed to take one.  I bite into it and it is delicious. As is the wine. When one sense is completely gone, all others seem to be heightened. My appetizer was mercifully a pate spread on toast, so I could feel around and easily eat it with my hands. Embarrassingly, I do the same with the small salad on my plate, as I can not find my fork. By the time my main dish arrives, though, I have a fork in hand and am determined to use it. And use it, I do!  My taste buds are titillated by the flavors that fill my mouth. The haddock has a luscious salmon mouse on it and a wasabi glaze.  I do not expect to find stewed eggplant but love the taste and the texture. And the dill that somehow ends up on my mashed potatoes is delightful. I find myself scraping my plate in the darkness, not wanting to leave one morsel behind. 

My eyes never get used to the dark. I can not find one speck of light in the room. But the experience is exciting and almost, just almost, scary. I mean, what if my spouse thinks it might be funny to switch out my dinner plate for a a lettuce leaf or to put my wine glass on the other side of the table?  Worse yet, what if he decides to goose me while I am shoving a fork into my mouth or sipping my wine?  Moreover, how do I know I am really eating fish and mashed potatoes?  It could be mashed worms for all I know!  Like I said, it's all about trust. As we leave, we see a party of 17 arrive. I honestly can't imagine how that would work unless they are seated 2 by 2, or 3 by 3 at most.  And, honestly, I don't have THAT much trust - 17 is too many people to rely on.  Would I recommend this restaurant? Highly. I think it is something that must be experienced - for a couple of reasons. First, as I said, when you are completely deprived of sight, food takes on a new dimension. As do the other senses. And that element of trust that is required for an experience like this?  I found it refreshing, unifying, and quite intimate.